This is Part 3 of 7 in a series of blog posts about the book Panic to Peace: Living Free from the Grip of Fear (CLICK HERE TO PURCHASE)
In previous parts of this series, I shared about the panic attacks and anxiety that I began experiencing years ago. I had no idea at the time that what I was going through was merely symptoms of hidden issues. I had been carrying the immense weight of shame and fear for a very long time, which had finally gotten the best of me. But I did not want to face any of that!
I struggled, for what seemed like an eternity, with the symptoms of anxiety. With fear in complete control of my life, I was miserable almost all of the time. There seemed to be no break from the heart palpitations, shakiness, lightheadedness, and general uneasiness I felt around others. On top of it all, the frightening panic attacks were increasing in frequency and severity.
I was in need of some kind of solution. I desperately wanted to feel better. Countless hours were spent researching possible diagnoses and cures. I searched the internet for possible illnesses that might explain the symptoms I was experiencing, along with suggested treatments. I read self-help books and sought the advice of others, which consisted of anyone who had advice they were willing to give. I was flooded with possible fixes.
After a long while of hoping the answer would be around the next corner, I was consistently faced with three choices. First, I could just give up, which I wanted to do many times. In those moments, I felt hopeless and sometimes furious at God for either making me miserable, or passively allowing me to be. I was not sure which one it was, but I was sure He was responsible somehow for my condition. The second option that kept presenting itself was to try harder. I would try harder to find a fix, or to somehow appease God so He would fix it. I always wound up back at option one, frustrated and feeling hopeless after my efforts were fruitless.
The final option was one that came after much time spent on gravitating between giving up and trying harder. It’s one word, but there was a lot wrapped up in it for me. This choice was to finally “surrender”. Surrendering my efforts to fix the problem myself was only the beginning, and that sounded absolutely, horrifyingly crazy to me. It sounded a lot like “giving up”, which I had tried before. However, “surrendering” turned out to be much different. There was much more to surrender than I had ever imagined when I reached the point of being willing to truly consider it.
I will continue sharing my portions of my journey through fear, anxiety, and panic attacks here on my blog for the next several weeks. To get more insight into my story, please pick up a copy of my book here: Panic to Peace: Living Free from the Grip of Fear.
Don’t forget to email me if you purchase two or more copies of the book, so I can send you the Bonus Chapter of Panic to Peace, not included in the book. These will be going out shortly! And, if you would like, please subscribe to my email list below: