I was introduced to coaching through a small group setting. For several months we journeyed together and the process of self-discovery was life changing. I identified some areas of my life that were keeping me stuck and I wasn’t sure what exactly to do with them. After the small group coaching ended, I continued meeting with the coach individually. The coach listened to me. She asked some clarifying questions and helped me discover that one main reason I couldn’t move forward was because of a lie I was believing. I believed that I had to keep everyone happy and content or I was failing. It was all my responsibility. I could not move forward because guess who was deciding if everyone was happy or not? Me! And do you want to guess how I always perceived their response? You got it….I didn’t think they were happy and I never thought I did enough. If something wasn’t exactly right I blamed myself. Guess who really wasn’t happy? Me! The lies yelled at me and kept me stuck. I was only getting more and more frustrated. Through coaching, I was able to hear myself. I was able to see things more clearly and therefore, move forward. Do I still hear these lies and believe them at times? Yes, I certainly do, but now I am able to catch them. I am able to talk through them with someone I trust and stop the cycle.
The International Coach Federation (ICF) defines coaching as “partnering with clients in a thought-provoking and creative process that inspires them to maximize their personal and professional potential.” Many times, it is looked at as counseling. While the two things do share some similarities, they are different. Coaching is not counseling. In coaching, the client is in the driver’s seat and the coach is along for the ride in the passenger seat. We look straight out the front window and have a goal in mind of where we are going. We get to know each other well as we prepare for the journey. We begin to trust each other as we look to see what is keeping us from starting our journey. This may be things such as lies we are believing about ourselves or unmet needs and expectations we have. It could also be hidden things in our lives that are keeping us stuck and in bondage. We also prepare for obstacles we may encounter along the way. We will have to make pit stops and refuel on this journey.
People seek out coaching because they are looking for growth and forward movement. It may be in a physical, spiritual, relational or emotional area of your life such as (but definitely not limited to) food/diet, exercise, goal setting, career choices, or understanding self or loved one. Coaching helps you discover what you need to go on your journey. As a Board Certified Coach, I help you create a vision for your journey and walk alongside you through it.
-Melissa
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