Labels

Identifying myself has never been an easy thing for me. I have often found myself stalling when, in the process of signing up for a social media site, I get to the “about me” section. Immediately, I think about my relationships and what I do. I am a father, a husband, a son, and a brother. I am a counselor and an accountant. Hobbies that I enjoy, such as weightlifting and listening to music, come to my mind. Political views can be thrown in there as well, although this is not something that I tend to do. Having studied temperament counseling, I also know that my temperament (which describes specific and consistent aspects of my personality) is something called “Melancholy”. The information that goes along with that tells me quite a bit about my tendencies, needs, strengths, and weaknesses.

Labels are helpful, but not sufficient.

That kind of information is helpful in giving others an idea of who we are. However, it is not enough. We are so complex, simple labels cannot adequately describe all that we are. Although I can say that I am a husband, or even a “husband that loves his wife”, no one can see how I relate to her and how I convey my love with a few, mere words. If I described myself as a Republican or Democrat, that would give someone a general idea of my views, but would come very short of conveying my complete ideology. We need to be open to the fact that labels are just helpful tools, not something to be relied upon strictly.

Labels can be bondage.

Although helpful at times, labels can also become detrimental. As with anything taken in excess, labels, too, can become excessive and relied upon too much. I remember a point during my full-time counseling work when I realized I had lost myself. I know that may sound a bit strange, but let me explain. While at work, ministering to others, I was fine. While away from work, I was not. I was stressed out and resembled a zombie much of the time. All I could think about was the sessions I had the previous week and the sessions I would have the following week. I was a counselor. Unfortunately, I had allowed that to be ALL that I was. Once I realized that and released that label as the sum of my identity, I found freedom. The label of “counselor” was, and is, a wonderful output of who I am, but it is not ALL that I am. That goes for any other label as well.

Labels may come from an unreliable source.

I have stated many times that I often struggle with feeling stupid. Without going to far into that again, let me just say that a common tendency for me is to assume I am an idiot. This, obviously, is a label that I sometimes allow to describe me. That leads to behaviors and feelings consistent with that label, such as trying to prove myself, attain more knowledge, hide from chances of being exposed as an idiot, etc. It is vitally important to examine the source of our labels. All labels are not completely accurate. However, some are completely inaccurate.

The truth of who we are needs to be sought above all else.

Regardless of the source of our labels, the best way to determine whether or not that source is accurate is to have access to the truth. When we know the truth, the false labels are easily recognized. Once we recognize them, we can choose to believe the truth and act accordingly. A more accurate label can even be applied, if necessary. The trouble here is, where do we go for truth regarding who we are? We can ask family and friends, we can look at our accomplishments and failures, and we can read and study books on the subject. However, the trouble is that those sources can all be unreliable at times. What we need is a consistent source of truth so that we are not blown around by feelings and what we or others think.

Ask God for an accurate label.

Being our Father and Creator, God knows us better than anyone, including ourselves. God is Love, and He is also Truth. As I read through the Bible, I find it very helpful to frequently ask Him the question, “Who am I?”. I have heard others doing it by asking God for his or her true “name”. However we decide to do it, we need to acknowledge Him as the perfect source of telling us truth, including about who we are. If God filled out my “about me” section, what would He say? That’s what I need to know, believe, and hold onto when other sources tell me something different.