Recently, in a conversation I had with several others, it was suggested that “people never change”. Having counseled many people over the past five years, I admit, I was rather annoyed by this comment. However, after some thought, I realized what this person may have been attempting to convey to the rest of us. In that person’s experience, there had been little evidence of lasting change in people who try to change themselves. That’s something I can agree with. Attempting to modify our behaviors is fruitless because we are incapable of changing ourselves. For behaviors to change consistently, there must be a deeper change that takes place, and that change must be instigated from something outside of us. There must be a change in the heart, and only God can do this. It does require steps of faith on our part, though. True change does not come about from a passive stance. It is a difficult road to take. Sometimes it’s a choice one makes to face the reality of where they are at in life despite the temptation to keep hiding and acting like everything is okay.
Sometimes it’s a choice one makes to surrender things to God that they really would like to hold onto due to fear of what may happen if they truly let go. Sometimes it’s a choice to take a risk at losing relationships with others by setting up healthy boundaries.
I have had the privilege of counseling many awesome people while serving full-time as a minister/counselor. I have also had the awesome privilege of being invited to come alongside these friends and watch them bravely work through tremendous hardships. I have had the incredible opportunity to watch these people make the choice to trust the Lord and then to watch our Heavenly Father do His work in these people’s lives. People may never change…themselves, but God definitely responds to their willingness to surrender to Him…and He definitely changes the hearts of people. I have seen it.